This is my Fight!

"Even after the stormiest weather, a true warrior will still reflect the brilliant rays of the magnificent sun through both his or her eyes. You may get hit by sudden lightning or take severe beatings from the cruel winds, but you will always get back up and stand strong on your feet again, soak in the sunlight, and be prepared to get hit by the most merciless hail- time and time again.”

-Suzy Kassem

It has been a difficult week for me. Trying to manage my pain levels while also doing all of my regular activities has been a significant challenge.

Upon reflection, it occurred to me that I have never lived a day without pain. A day without pain is as mythical as a unicorn to me. I don’t know what it looks like or how it feels. It is unfathomable to me. I have learned how to live with it. For me, the hardest part of this is and has been wrestling with the feelings of defeat and disappointment that resurface when I need to rest, because I don’t want the pain to win.

I know so many people who are fighting their own battles right now. It is one of the reasons why I felt so compelled to write this blog. For all of you warriors out there, to all of you who are struggling, to all of you who feel as though you are not strong enough to handle what you’re dealing with right now, I have a message for you. You CAN, and you WILL.

Earlier this week, a very special person in my life reminded me that resting your body and your brain does not mean that you are admitting defeat. It does not mean that you have given up. It doesn’t mean that your struggles have won. It is important to take the time you need to rest and recharge your batteries, so that you can get up and fight again. If you are reading this, you know who you are. Thank you!

As tumultuous as this journey can be, and as much it can test our strength at times, these storms teach us to appreciate life in all it’s glory when the sun does comes out from behind the clouds again. My struggles have given me a deep sense of empathy. My journey has drove and inspired me to advocate for those who are facing similar challenges, in an effort to one day change the way that medical professionals view Cerebral Palsy and chronic pain.

I truly believe that there is a little bit of warrior in all of us. That warrior spirit inside of you is what will give you the strength to keep going.

It is what reminds me that this is my fight, and it even though it attempts to kick me in the butt sometimes, I refuse to let it win.

A big thank you to Hedley for writing such an inspirational song.